|
Warner bros. canCels all future dc Films. Matthew vaughn Directed sUperman reboot coming 20193/30/2017 By Wyatt J.P After reports that Joss Wheadon would be directing a Batgirl solo film it appears that that has been completely thrown out the window as Warner Bros. Has cancelled all of their upcoming DCEU films including The Flash, Cyborg, Green Lantern Corp, Suicide Squad 2, Gotham City Sirens, and yes The Batman. Geoff Johns has stated that they will be completely rebooting the DCEU starting in 2019 with Matthew Vaughn's Superman reboot, Superman: Origins. Geoff Johns talked about the massive shift in direction in the statement below.
I am deeply heartbroken. I did everything in my power to keep WB from rebooting the DCEU. But that chink Kevin Tsujihara never even gave me a chance to speak at the meetings. Seriously fuck that jap cunt. As much as it pains me to say it, please I urge you not to see Wonder Woman and Justice League this year as they mean absolutely nothing now. I truly hope that we can set a good clean slate with Superman: Origins, that is if Tsujihara doesn't chop Vaughn's balls off with his Katana blade like he did with Ayer. Well this news is a massive Cleveland steamer to all us comic book fans. Is there any hope left for DC? Let us know.
0 Comments
Article by: Some faggot
Recent DNA test show that Isaac Perlmutter is in fact the biological father of Tom Holland. This news has literally blown the internet this is what Perlmutter said about this: “See shit like this used to common on the good old days. Big man Avi hade kids left right and center, he even was the father of Jennifer Law…. wait i am not suppose to say that. Forget what i said. Anyways the point is people shouldn't lose their mind about this. yes i raped i mean hade sex with Tom`s mom, yes i am his father. Who cares. CLUB PENGUIN IS SHUTTING DOWN GUYS THAT'S WAY MORE IMPORTANT THAN THIS” Comment down below and remember... WHITE POWER! By Wyatt J.P
Neill Blompkamp best known for directing District 9, District 10: Matt Damon Robo-Man, and of course Chappie: The 11th District starring Die Ant something, has officially ended his filmmaking career. Here's what he had to say when I found him in the dumpster at his home in Vancouver. Yeah I'm done. Notice I'm not speaking to you in my African accent, well guess why, that's right I've never even stepped foot in that place. I only said that to get sympathy fucks and because movies about oppression are what the kids like nowadays. I barely even directed District 9, Peter Jackson did most of it, I just liked playing games on his phone he let me borrow. I decided to do District 9 again with Matt Damon and I actually tried hard but didn't end up finishing it I had my good buddy ghost director #4 who directed some of Fant4stic to finish it. Then Chappie was just a favor for that autistic rap group. I was gonna do an Alien movie but Ridley Scott said he'd rape me if I went anywhere near it. So kid you like meth? He then stabbed me and took my wallet before I could respond. What do you think about this? Let us know. Article by: @CinematicBanter
Just now in the news, we have been given the surprise that Katie Cassidy will be returning to Arrow for not only the final two episodes of Arrow Season 5 but will continue forward into Season 6 as a SERIES REGULAR! Fans are really excited by this news due to how some do not like the original Black Canary’s portrayal but feel Black Siren is something fresh and unique. However, following from this news, Marc Guggenheim was going around journalist sites as CBR and ComicBook.com, obviously it was no surprise to us that he definitely wanted an interview with us here at Unreel News (I swear I didn't have to suck his dick, I had to binge that shitty animated show of his called ‘Trollhunters’ I don't remember). Anyhow, as Guggenheim sat down with us, panting because of all his fat flapping around him, he quickly calmed down and started our mini interview.Firstly we started off with asking Guggenheim how it was to have Katie Cassidy back for Arrow once again, he responded: “Yeah, yeah (still panting), it's really great because I don't know if you saw but then nudes LIKE GOD DAMN, between you and me, that was my dick she was sucking (SIDE-NOTE: we do not believe him for a second) but anyways, I think it's great that I'll get to that ass in that sexy black leather once again” Then came what shocked us when we asked how Olicity would be affected by this decision, Guggenheim sharply responded: “Olicity is the fucking most retarded shit I've ever made, and I made fucking Donna Smoak” We then asked him to elaborate on that comment, and his response was SHOCKING: “You see the thing is, one night, me, Wendy and the lads were on the prowl for pussy (Wendy is a lesbian) and we got drunk and Greg dared me to make Oilver and Felicity have sex and be in a relationship for at least a season, now you see I'm not one to back down from a bet and I accepted. The problem was that Olicity Shills became to spawn from the wreckage I constructed, and as a result it was hard, well I had a hard on also but it was hard to get rid of it, the Olicity bet had gone wrong and I still never got that $20 from Greg and Wendy. I made the decision best fitting for myself and decided to just fuck it and make them break up” Guggenheim then ran out of our offices, while we could still hear him panting and then shouting down the street: “GIMME KATIES NUDES” We will update you on this story as it progresses. "Arrow" airs Wednesdays at 8 p.m. ET/PT on The CW if anyone cares. By Wyatt J.P After much controversy surrounding the upcoming Diary of a Wimpy Kid reboot, I finally got a chance to sit down with the director of the film David Bowers at the pro-long haul rally. I asked him about the controversy regarding the film. He said the following.
I have never been more excited for people to see this amazing film. The haters are probably a bunch of Trump supporters HAHAHA! I then asked him specifically about the #NotMyRoderick campaign. It's pure rubbish. Charlie Wright embodies the character and there is a key scene where he talks about his gender. He is Non-Binary in the film. I asked him what the fuck Non-Binary means. What the fuck kid!? Didn't they teach you in sex ed class about the 36 genders. Non-Binary means he is neither a boy or girl. Go back to school bigot times have changed. This movie is gonna show those republicans we run the world now and that this isn't the 1800's anymore. Now get out of my face you nazi! Well what do you think about this news? Let us know. By Wyatt J.P Well the Justice League trailer dropped today and was it good? Fuck no it was the equivalent of watching a my mom get fucked in the ass by your dad as he calls her a disappointment and tells you to watch. Especially Cyborg what a fucking disappointment. He looked like he got skull fucked by the terminator and a total ripoff of Cable by the way. This trailer enraged my so much that I took a Katana and chopped my penis off because this trailer made me not want to have sex ever again because I'll be thinking about this boner killer for the rest of my father fucking life. I hope Zack Snyder gets shot, and I hope Geoff Johns is cutting his wrists.
Update: I just got off the phone with Kevin Fiege and he has hitmen en route to Snyder's location and is also paying for my penis surgery. Earning a disappointing 100 million at the box office and a negative score of 99 percent on Rotten Tomatoes, it still seems Blumhouse is confident to move forward with another installment. Although we here at Unreel News thinks this is a dumb idea, they're still going on with it and we have to live with it. We talked to the man in charge, Mr. Jason Blum to see why he is going on with this retarded decision. These were his comments. "I say why not continue the story? Hell, I didn't even know what this movie was about in first place until Jordan explained to me after preview screenings. I only green lit Get Out because it costs less than my family. And when we see those numbers come in like this movie did, we franchise the shit out of it. Just like we did with Insidious, Paranormal Activity, The Purge etc. That's all I have. now can you please GET OUT of my office". After that conversation, I tore down his favorite Jem and the Holograms poster while getting chased by security. The movie is now under the title of "Get Out 2: The Streets" and is aiming for an April 2018 release date. We really have no clue if Jordan Peele will actually come back to direct but we just assume he won't Anyways, what are your thoughts on a Get Out sequel? Do you think making this a franchise is a good idea? Did anyone actually go see Jem and the Holograms? Let us know in the comments and make sure to follow for more Unreel News. By Wyatt J.P Jon Favreau's upcoming remake of The Lion King has been very tight lipped. The only bit of casting we've gotten so far is Donald Glover and James Earl Jones. However I was able to get an interview with Favreau after I was run down by his limo. Here's what he said.
JESUS! Are you ok kid!? After I got patched up I asked him for an update on the status of the film he said this. The Lion King is very special to me however I feel like it has to have some much needed changes to be socially relevant. The old Lion King was a lot like Hamlet. This one is more like Moonlight. Simba is a gay lion cub who is in the closet runs away after Scar kills his father Mufasa and tells him to get his faggoty ass away from Pride Rock or he's gonna get beat down. I also changed Nala to Neil. The only other creature that has ever touched Simba. They touch tails to symbolize their love. I also of course made Timone and Pumba gay as fuck, I'm talking E! Network and Bravo level gay What do you think about this progressive move by Disney. Let us know. By Wyatt J.P Max Landis is a very polarizing figure. Some people think he's a genius while others call him a media whore. Well now Max's father Jon Landis has come fourth and stated his opinion on his son.
My son was a mistake. I was going to talk my wife into getting an abortion but we wanted a family so we went through with it. But after seeing my son's homo erotic haircut last year, and was forced to sit through Victor Frankenstein and Me Him Her, it dawned on me. I should've taken that coat hanger shoved the fucker way up there years ago. My son hasn't made a half ok film since Chronicle which I even tried to force FOX to do a sequel with Max's script, but I was kicked out of the offices. That was the last time I truly loved my son. He's a disgrace to our Jewish heritage. I would send him to Auschwitz if I could. Do you agree with director Jon Landis let us know. Article by: @CinematicBanter
After a recent Reddit leak on the 14th March 2017, regarding the future of the DC Comics Cinematic Universe, one comment was made about Gal Gadot and Ezra Miller who play the parts of Wonder Woman and The Flash. The following comment states: “Ezra Miller was reportedly heavily intoxicated for the Justice League shoot, and got into a physical scuffle with Gal Gadot. Ever the peacemaker, Henry Cavill broke up the fight.” After that leak, today, Geoff Johns has come out with an official statement regarding the situation mentioned in the leaks, he went on to say the following: “It was a very late night when Ezra got drunk, not going to lie, I myself was a bit tipsy as well, but some of the WB executives were there to watch these fight go down, and it showed how much conflicting chemistry these two actors had against each other” He then went on to announce that instead of The Flash Movie coming in 2018, instead we would see a Wonder Woman vs The Flash film, inspired by the events that were caused on that night. Geoff Johns went on to say the following about this new film in the press release, stating that: “The conflicting chemistry really intrigued the executives’ present on that night, and it even gave me a hard-on, we begun penning an early draft of the script with some screenwriters that I cannot currently announce. We will look forward to do a solo Flash film in the future but at the moment, this is the best way for us to make money.” Many fans online have been looking back at this Reddit leak now, speculating that the reason it is replacing The Flash Movie is because of how it has been moved to 2020 due to it being such a mess and getting a Page 1 script-rewrite. Us at Unreel_News were interested in what the two headlining characters had to say about this so we managed to give a few handjobs and even a blowjob in order to get two interviews with Ezra and Gal. When we asked Ezra about the Wonder Woman vs The Flash film, he stated that: “I am very excited to work on this project and a much different and unique project with DC Comics, I hope the director we choose will pick the vision that fans will enjoy, I feel this film has so much story to it than a Flash film could have, due to the TV show taking a lot of our story ideas that we could have used for our Flash film. (we then heard him mutter ‘fucking CW ass cunts’) Anyhow I am excited to work with all of the new and old cast and crew on this exciting new project” It really seemed like a passion project that Gal and Ezra wanted to do together, until when we asked Gal the question, we got a very short and sharp response. She stated to us that: “I am going to fucking beat up that Jewish cunt, I will literally break him if he touches me again” There is no word on a director yet, however Mel Gibson and George Lucas’ names are being highly speculated. -CB |
Archives
October 2018
Categories |